I think the ultimate role model for African American Men is Keith Sweat.  IT HAS TO BE, because they are some begging a** brothers.  Some would say SIMPS.  I was scrolling through my timeline on Facebook and noticed there was a post about African Americans practicing polygamy (which they probably really meant polygyny), as a way to save their communities from the despair they are going through with broken homes.

Every time I see these posts, I see droves and droves of Black Men trying to convince Black Women to agree to practicing polygyny, and almost all the time droves and droves of black women come in and say the same thing over and over.  Which is simply a big fat emphatic “HELL NO”!  I sit back and laugh, because it’s mainly Afro-Centric Hotep Brothers dreaming of a Black Utopia participating in these begging and pleading sessions.MBWI_jpg_900x600_q85

Brothers just cannot accept that Black African American women aren’t interested for the most part.  They say the run of the mill typical stuff such as,”brothers can’t take care of and or satisfy one black woman, so how in the hell are they going to handle more than one”.  Better yet, how about the proverbial, “if black men can have polygyny, then why not polyandry?”

What’s funny is both parties already practice polyandry and polygyny.  Brothers have more than one baby mother, and black women have more than one baby daddy.  The other funny thing is they pretend to act as if you have to be some special type of man to practice polygyny.  As if you have to reach some Zen-like quality state of being and enlightenment to handle more than one “Sista”.

Even the so called conscious black women reject polygyny.  Now check this out.  Most of the people imported to be slaves in America came from West Africa, and the southern region where Angola is located.  Most of the people who identify as Black or African Americans are actually indigenous to America.  Both of these populations mixed and both practiced polygyny.black-women

Show me a time in history where our people didn’t practice polygyny.  Polygyny is natural to us……… always has been and always will be.  Monogamy is what is not natural to us, or should I say forced monogamy.  The so called conscious women know the story of our oppression and subjugation well.  So how is it that they are so against polygyny?  It’s because it takes away the power they have gained over black men through partnering with the oppressors and the state.

During Antebellum slavery, the slave masters allowed polygyny to exist amongst the slaves until they saw how fast it allowed them to multiply, so they put an end to it.  Polygyny is not about what most be people think it is.  At its basic roots, it’s about being able to increase the chances of having male children, so there will be more workers and doers to provide and defend the tribe against outside attacks, because women are the default sex.

The reality is that there are women all around the world who would love to be in a brother’s Harem, so why waste your time trying to convince women who are not interested?  Since sex is commerce, it is plausible to secure it like any other business transaction.  If you have a product or service, you don’t waste your time marketing to people who are not interested in your product or service,!  That would be business suicide.

women smiling --- Image by © Jack Hollingsworth/Blend Images/Corbis

women smiling — Image by © Jack Hollingsworth/Blend Images/Corbis

Humans are imperfect beings, so nothing we do will be perfect, but black women always make it seem as if you have to be perfect in order to practice polygyny;  yet and still, they will share a man and brag about being a “side chick”. Then there is the issue of saying a man must provide for all of his wives.  That is impossible to do and unrealistic, especially in this day and time. Some of these very same women are supporting men just to keep some “D” around.  Men are not by default supposed to provide protection and provision.

A Man is supposed to provide guidance, structure, and leadership first!  Provision and protection is a by product of that. If you have no money but you have plenty of ideas and know how, find some women with money, organize them to be productive, then there are provisions for everyone.  This whole concept of going out and working like a slave to support women is foolishness and non sense. I can keep going but the fact is brothers need to let them go, and find a market that supports what you want.




About The Author

Founder & CEO

21st Century Moor, Author, Historian, Futurist, Serial & Social Entrepreneur; who analyzes and critiques the hypocrisy and lunacy of humanity. The more you know, the more you can do. The less you know, the less you can do.

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  • disqus_TB9D3v26R6

    This article is ridiculous. It is heteronormative, provides little scientific evidence or statistic of proof of the “facts” that are provided, and is based on a major assumption. As a Black queer woman in a polyamorous relationship, I am appalled by the accusations and generalizations made.

    1. It is common in our society, and in our community, men to objectify women. Often times, when men say things like “more woman should consider polygamy/andy/etc” it’s not presented as a means of building a community, creating a supportive relationship, or any of the positive things that can actually come from having multiple partners if you so choose. Usually, the men making these comments are “fake deep” and encouraging this because they want to have multiple partners and have it be okay. Rarely do men post things like this with the willingness to have a concrete discussion or explanation as to why multiple partners is ideal and a beneficial option. So yes, the response from women is HELL NO.

    2. Not all or even “most” Black women have multiple baby daddy’s, not all Black men have baby mama’s. And for those that happen to have children with different parents, this does not prove a basic need for polygamy. This is just proof that we all fuck up sometimes. Maybe we have a child with someone, it doesn’t work out, and then we have a child with someone else. If person A was not fit to be a parent, why do you thin polygamy would solve this issue?

    3. We live in a society where monogamy is valued over other forms of relationships. I personally don’t agree with this. I wish our society highlighted the positive attributes of having multiple partners.

    “The so called conscious women know the story of our oppression and subjugation well. So how is it that they are so against polygyny? It’s because it takes away the power they have gained over black men through partnering with the oppressors and the state.”

    Or perhaps women are against it because it doesn’t allow them to have multiple partners too? Perhaps women simply want ethical and equitable relationships? Women don’t have power over anyone. Perhaps the polygyny structure just takes over the little personal power they have. I don’t know what you are trying to get at here.

    4. I guess where we butt heads is in how we view sex. I don’t view it as a business transaction or commerce, but perhaps some people do. And perhaps those people will find other people that have that viewpoint. But for those who view sex as an act that occurs in a healthy relationship, there are other options.

    5. You don’t have to be perfect to practice any form or relationship that include multiple partners. But I think there are ethics that need to be considered. The “side chick/ side nigga” idea isn’t ethical. It is hurtful and damaging to relationships and people. It is not the same as having multiple partners who are in an agreement or a loving and supportive relationship. I encourage those who are interested in having multiple partners to read about ethical polyamory. In ethical polyamory, one or more of the involved parties has multiple partners, but resources are shared in a way that works for everyone. It is not impossible or even unrealistic if people choose to support one another.

    6. Men are not supposed to be the sole provide of guidance or anything else. Relationships work when everyone involved takes on the weight. When everyone involved assists where they can, guides where they can, leads where they can, and supports one another. I personally don’t believe in hierarchical relationships.

    Continuing to refer to sex as a commodity and sexual relations as a market continues to objectify women (In this case, because of your heternormative language, it only objectifies women. But outside of this language, it would objectify whomever the person’s sexual partner is). This is wrong. If a person chooses to have sex with someone outside of a relationship, they can view it however they want. And we can only hope that they are doing it in an ethical matter. But if someone chooses to have a relationship with someone, they are committing to something more than a business transaction. And that discussion needs to be had with the people within the relationship.

    Your comments are a bit violent and damaging. They are exclusive to people in the Black community that do not exist in heterosexual relationships. They are harmful to women. They reinforce this “love/sex is a game” concept. I am in a committed relationship with a man and a woman. We share resources together. We love one another. We don’t believe that monogamy is the only option for relationships. We chose one another, and continue to choose one another every day. It’s not as cookie cutter as my boyfriend is the leader and my girlfriend and I are a part of his harem. It’s so much more than that. I want people to know that non-monogamy can be beneficial and useful and supportive. But not for the reasons that you’ve stated.


      Wow. So it is agreed that ” anti monogamous” culture would be a step in the right direction, yet somehow we still found a way to find fault with the writer ??

      If not for bolstering the population, then what exactly? You’ve spent time being critical, yet I don’t recall reading any supportive reasoning from you, at all. In fact, you remind me of these “politrickians” that always state how the other candidates idea is garbage, instead of presenting any alternatives.

      To reiterate, you’ve agreed to agree and be disagreeable.

      Its like as if you realize what’s being stated IS in fact accurate, yet you don’t like it because of where it came from.

      From what I have come to see about monogamy, it was simply a imposition from the Vatican. A way to curtail the polyamorists’ aggressive collection of young women, which often left entire villages “vaginaless”; and the population of warriors more numerous than the enemy that planned to conquer them.

      Do you realize that you actually practice “haremitic” culture!
      The act of women pleasuring women comes out from polygyny. Often, certain harem women would ” warm up the crowd ” for the man so when he joined, he could simply dive deep into the waves. SPLASH!
      It wouldn’t stop there necessarily.
      You will undoubtedly, and vehemently disagree, yet you seem to have your own little two girl harem you are already a part of, too!

      While I won’t spend time combing over each and every point I see differently than you, I have to say it is seriously time to wake up if you don’t recognize copulation and subsequent “lifebearing” as commerce, commercial transaction!

      The people you pay your taxes do see it that way!

      Why do you think you have a birth certificate?? Lol

      I MUST agree with your #6 assertion, though. Our nuclear family structure is indeed supposed to be even and balanced. My fellow men out here have managed to challenge every aspect of this open society, except the part that says they are the facilitators. Its this thinking that has led to this state we are all in now, creating the most epic domestic dispute EVER, between “ethnic” men and women; that seems to still stand the test of time.

      I skipped over some other points I initially intended to address on here
      simply because its turning into a book.

      P.S. harems ( that I am aware of ) weren’t populated by “sistas” They were staffed by caucasian women, as well as their mixed offspring..

      Moor to Life

  • Felina Femenina

    Goodbye, and good riddance.